Who hasn’t had an experience of procrastinating that work or school assignment? Binging that entire new season of Brooklyn Nine-Nine may have felt like a really great idea in the moment, but the assignment is still due and the anxiety is even bigger. Now you have to stay up all night finishing it or deal with the consequences of handing it in late.
Generally, it’s not the situation we are avoiding, it is the outcome. We often are afraid of the worst-case scenario. You may ask why is it important to face my fear or anxiety? It feels so natural to avoid what makes us feel fear. Binging episodes of your favourite Netflix show or staying in bed all day seems a lot more appealing when thinking about doing that task or completing that assignment that is causing anxiety. The problem is, when we avoid what we fear even though it feels better in the moment, we often become overwhelmed and feel paralyzed. The fear grows so big that it seems we will never be able to manage it. This vicious cycle keeps us stuck and can cause long term consequences.
One strategy to help face anxiety is to recognize what is inside your control and what is outside of your control. Oftentimes we may get fixated on things outside of our control like worrying about what the future will bring or worrying about what other people think. We can’t control these things. What is inside of your control is the power that you give your thoughts, feelings and how you act. Thoughts and feelings come and go. We will all experience helpful and unhelpful thoughts and feelings. Where you have control is whether you choose to focus on the positive or negative. Bring yourself back to thoughts that are true, helpful, inspiring, necessary and kind. A helpful way to remember this is the acronym THINK (T-TRUE, H-HELPFUL, I-INSPIRING, N-NECESSARY, K-KIND).
Facing our fears is an ongoing and lifelong practice. Using these strategies can be helpful in supporting you on your journey. There will be days that managing fear and anxiety will be harder and others that feel easier. Be kind to yourself and on the hard days remember that we are all on this journey together.
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